April 11, 2021

Toxic relationships are addictive. That chaotic love, the unending fights, the jealousy, and everything in between keeps you coming back for more. Unbeknownst to many, it can adversely affect your health and your life in general. It may be sweet in the short-run, but deadly with time. So if you think your partner is madly in love with you that he can’t stand you talking to others, think again. You might be in a deadly toxic relationship. 

What's a relationship red flag?

A relationship redflag is anything that jeopardizes your relationship such as disrespect, neglect, or isolation. Red flags indicate how your relationship is likely to turn out. Therefore, noticing toxic red flags and taking the appropriate action can save you from future heartbreak or even violence. And here are more redflags to watch out for.

1. Lack of trust and honesty

Trust and honesty are the backbone of any relationship. Without them, your relationship is dead. In a healthy relationship, being honest and trusting in each other’s judgement will go a long way to alleviate distrust and miscommunication. When one partner keeps things from you and doesn’t care to apologize even after you discover their lies, that’s a red flag. And you should steer clear of that person.    

2. Lack of freedoms

Being in a relationship doesn’t qualify you as a prisoner. When your partner regularly questions what you do, or they stop you from doing things that make you happy, that's a sign of toxicity. Your partner should embrace your freedom to do the things you love instead of trashing your actions. They don’t own you. You don’t own them. Each of you had a life before you met each other. Both of you will still have a life after you leave each other (knock on wood.) It’s not a privilege. It’s your right.

3. Lack of communications

Proper communication is the pillar of every good relationship. Poor communication is a killer. When your partner doesn't communicate their feelings or dodges your questions, that’s red flag. You can never know how they feel or what they think. And that is likely to harm your relationship.

4. Controlling behaviors

Another red flag of toxic relationship is over-controlling behavior. Control freaks are happy when you support their hobbies and talents but unhappy about your interests. Worse still, they try to stop you from pursuing your passion. This behavior is also characterized by jealousy, especially when they stop you from hanging out with your friends. 

5. Unhappiness

If you thrive on making your partner happy in a relationship but don’t reciprocate or make an effort to make you happy, that shows that your partner is toxic. You shouldn’t sacrifice your happiness for people who don’t want to see you happy.  

6. Abusive behavior

You shouldn’t tolerate any form of abuse in a relationship. Abusive behavior is more than a red flag. Abuse in a relationship can be physical, verbal, emotional, and psychological. You should stop the relationship immediately once you experience any form of abuse. And if your partner abuses you physically, you should report them to the relevant authorities.  

7. Insecurities

Extreme insecurity is the killer of most relationships.A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere.If your partner demands to check your phone or asks for your passwords, it means they are toxic, and they don't trust you.

8. Friends and family warnings

Lastly, sometimes close friends and family may warn you about your partner’s toxic behavior. In that case, you should listen and do a background check to find out the truth. This is because friends and family are likely to catch some red flags and behaviors you might overlook. After all, you’re in love.  

What to do if you notice toxic relationship red flags

There are some red flags in a relationship that, if worked upon, can make your relationship better. You should open up to your partner about how you truly feel. Tell them how their behavior is affecting you and the relationship in general. If they love you and they value your relationship, they’ll change.

But if you experience adverse toxic red flags like abusive behavior, you should quit as soon as possible. Adverse toxic behaviors are irreversible, and your partner is unlikely to change.  They can cost you your health, peace of mind, or even life.